White baby...stickers

Yesterday, Chris and I attended an introductory session about the Creighton model of NFP.  (by the way, lets all ignore the fact that I haven't blogged in months and jump right back into this!)

I saw my doctor in November, and after hearing that Chris and I had been hoping to be pregnant for over a year she suggested we learn the Creighton model, especially considering my family history.  I may have mentioned this, but the Creighton model and NaPro technology is what helped my sister get pregnant with my niece after 11 years of infertility.

We had already attended an NFP intro session when we were engaged and had been charting since then - but I still felt like I learned some new things during this session.

One sentence that really stuck out to me, and I don't know why I've never thought of it this way, was "If women are at most times infertile, then the couple is at most times infertile."  It seems like one of those "well, duh" sentences and yet, I had never thought of it like that.

Anyway, so we reviewed anatomy and physiology and then got into the details of charting.  We were already familiar with charting, but this time we will only be charting cervical mucus (I am 27 years old and still hate that word...) and using fun stickers!  We are entering into a world of red, green, white baby and green baby stickers.

I am still holding out so. much. hope.  Every month.  "Hope does not disappoint."  "We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure."  Two of my favorite verses.  I'm starting to feel a little ridiculous for letting this take up so much space in my mind and heart.  There are so many other blessings in my life, why am I fixating on this one thing??  I keep thinking, well, maybe this will be the month, and then we won't need to worry about all this!  My doctor will be shocked, our follow ups with the Creighton lady will be easy peasy.  But, then I remember some other things I learned last night...some of the things I've noticed about my cycle seem to point to sub- or infertility and low progesterone.  Although I probably shouldn't jump to any conclusions yet, right?

Ok enough about our journey into charting biomarkers (ha!  I avoiding have to say...the "m" word).

Christmas and New Years were fabulous (and eventful, but we can leave that for another post).  I have a recap in the works but in the mean time I figured I'd leave you with this.  Maybe I'm back for good?  Here's hoping.

Here's some pictures from the past few months to liven this post up a bit:

I got bangs!  New year, new hair

Crochet santa hat...first pattern I've made on my own

Favorite Christmas tradition

Festive Buster!

One of many new projects...gift card holder

Snow White @ work

Dinosaur set...hat, diaper cover, and booties

Boy & Girl minions!

My first Ravens game!!

bulletin board in my office "Be who you are, and be that perfectly well" St. Frances de Sales

Another wall in my office. 

"We are each of us like a small mirror in which God searches for his reflection" St. John Vianney

Hubs turned 29!

drowsy owl

elephant (for a friend's baby...she is obsessed with elephants)

white cabinets and new lighting and appliances

Counseling as a Reflection of God's love

I wrote this a few weeks ago...and kept meaning to publish it, but it got away from me (just like that post about our kitchen reno...I promise it's coming).  Anyways, here's the post from the draft folder

My emotional stores are empty.  Well...ok, not empty, but if I were a car - my warning light would be on by the gas meter.

This week I started telling my clients that I'm leaving the agency at the end of the month.  When I tell people how sad it is having to tell my clients, I will either get the response of "that's interesting, you wouldn't think it'd be so hard since you've only been there 4 months" or a more understanding "I can't imagine how hard that must be for you"

Yes, I’ve only been here 4 months…but in a therapeutic relationship, that’s plenty of time to have built up trust and a bond.  My youngest clients don’t quite grasp that I’m leaving – or they grasp it but are just like “ok cool, a new counselor to play with!” which makes it easier.  But my teenage clients – most of them have received the news less than happily.  Although I do have one particularly tough client who was literally smiling the whole time I gave my “I’m leaving the agency” speech.  I knew she’d be happy though, I’m just hoping I was able to plant some little seed in her during our time together that perhaps another counselor can help to grow. 

This morning, however, my one mostly nonverbal client nearly broke my heart with his reaction to my news. Whenever I would talk about transitioning to a new therapist he would just shake his head and emphatically point to me.  This client is one of my newer clients – and honestly, if you’d asked me yesterday whether I thought we’d built a therapeutic relationship, I probably would have said no, we’re still in the rapport building stage.  Apparently I was wrong.

I was reminded through this client about how much the therapeutic relationship (from a Pastoral Counseling view) mirrors Christ’s unconditional love for us.  Unconditional positive regard (can you tell I’m Rogerian?), empathy, grace.  Whatever you want to call it.  We show that to our clients when they come into our counseling space.  The same way that God does not stop loving us when we stumble, when we make mistakes, when we sin, is the same way counselors are with their clients.  Even during our intakes we let our clients know that we’re not here to get mad at them – we’re here to help them make better decisions so that when they do stumble (and stumble they will) they can get right back up and try again.

How many times have we, as Catholics, stumbled and taken ourselves to confession, had the priest, as the representation of Christ, show us grace, give us some encouragement and gently help us get back up and try again.

This is why I love what I do, and why I am so excited to soon be working in a Catholic environment.  The counseling relationship, the counseling room, has always been (for me – I can’t really speak for other counselors of course) such a beautiful reflection of God’s love.  And that has always been what I wanted – to be an instrument of that love for my clients. 

Here’s to hoping that I’ve accomplished that – maybe not with all, but at least a few of my clients in my time as a counselor.  

Any prayers you can offer up for me this week, as I terminate with all of my clients, would be greatly appreciated.  I have been holding on to this quote this week:"They may forget what you said, but they will never forget how you made them feel"

Long weekend...of painting

This is going to be a short post, more of a precursor to a post I'll be writing later.  About our mini kitchen reno.  

I hope everyone had a wonderful 4th of July weekend.  We hosted my family and make some delish GF& DF kabobs (my sister is dairy and gluten free).  I also made some yummy GF and DF peanut butter chocolate chip (dairy free) cookies.

And then Saturday we started the long.  very long.  process of painting our kitchen cabinets.  I've been wanting to do this since we moved in but have been more than slightly overwhelmed by the idea.  And rightly so it turns out.  But, never the less, we bought Rust-Oleum cabinet transformations in pure white and got to work.

We live in a townhouse without a garage and so we had to improvise on working space and could only paint half the cabinet doors at a time.  We took out our dining room table and put it in our living room and turned the dining room into the area for cabinet painting.  And let me just tell you how uncomfortable it has been painting like that.  More on that later though.

For now, here are a few "teaser" photos from my phone that shows a little of our progress.

This really shows the difference in color...beige/cream/gross to white!

First coat

First coat

We just finished putting the "protective coat" on the doors so by tonight they should be ready to have the new hardware put on.  I'll let you know all about how I've liked this product in the next post.

Until them, have a wonderful week!

5 Favorite Theme Songs

When I saw that Jen wanted to know our "theme songs" and that it's Wednesday - well I couldn't pass up the opportunity to answer her question and link up for Five Favorites with Heather.  Saying I love music doesn't quite encompass what music means to me - so narrowing this down is going to be difficult.  But, here goes!

1. Our wedding song - Changed by You by Between the Trees.  My friend Leslie told me about this small, pretty unknown band and listening to the song and the lyrics - and sharing it with Chris - we knew this would be "our" song.
"And so, if you're supposed to get what you deserve in life
You came just in the nick of time
God's grace has overtaken me
My love, needless to say, I am blessed by you"

Plus, I'm a sucker for a song with piano.

2. I Can Only Imagine by Mercy Me.  There are very few songs that take me back literally to one point in time.  Every time I hear this song I am taken back to a church, sitting in the back pews, listening to this song be performed by a couple guys that went to my high school for the funeral of my friend Doug.  The emotions tied up in this song are strong and it's a rare time that I can listen to it without tears coming to my eyes.

3. Wonderwall by Oasis.  This was pretty much my high school anthem and what I longed for.  That person to "save" me.  Fast forward to our honeymoon and Chris ended up singing this song to me at karaoke one night.  I high-fived my high school self for finding a guy who would sing this song to me

4. It wouldn't be right for Something Corporate to be missing from this list.  Another testament to my love for songs with piano.  Something Corporate was my favorite band all through high school and college and is one of those bands that I'm fairly certain I still know all the words to.  This was THE Something Corporate song.  I was never allowed to go to one of their concerts in high school and then the lead singer Andrew McMahon was diagnosed with leukemia and the band broke up (he later started up Jack's Mannequin - another awesome band).  They came back for a reunion tour which I went to with one of my best friends from high school...there's something about seeing your favorite band live.  When this song came on - literally everyone at the concert sang along.  It was awesome.
[DISCLAIMER: there's some language in this one, so listeners beware if little ears are near]

5.  I"m telling you, this was really hard to narrow down!  And I know throughout the day I"m going to stop and be like "man!  I should have put this song on the list!"  It may have been easier to do bands...but hey, maybe I'll add songs to this list at a later date.  For now, my fifth song - The Middle by Jimmy Eat World.  Music in high school was my life blood.  And this song...this song was just such a positive message for an angsty teen (and I was hardly the angstiest of teens)."Just be yourself, it doesn't matter if it's good enough for someone else."  Even my mom liked this song - which if you know my mom, that's simultaneously hilarious and shocking.  Also, I've never actually seen the music video for this - there are lots of half naked people, and a lot of making out.  But the song is still great.  And the message still comes across.

This was super fun.  Happy Wednesday all!  Yay for short weeks :-)

Answer Me This #2

Returning for some more "Answer Me This" hosted by Kendra at Catholic All Year.  Head on over and learn a little more about different bloggers

1. How often do you take public transportation?

Just about never.  We live in the suburbs right smack between DC and Baltimore which means we need cars to get most any where.  When Chris was still living in the "city" aka Baltimore we would take the bus anywhere we wanted to go for our date nights and what not.  Or if we want to go into DC we will most likely take the metro.  Which I hate.  I don't know why, but it freaks me out.

2. How many cousins do you have?

11 - 2 on my dads side and 9 on my mom's side.  Although, marrying into Chris' family means that I have waay more cousins now.  He has like 20 cousins.  It's pretty great.  Especially since the majority of my cousins are in Colombia.  The rest are spread all over the U.S. so I don't really get to see them all that often.

Here are some of Chris' cousins - minus a few

Mom's side of the fam - some cousins, most of them missing though

3. Have you ever fired a gun?

I have actually.  There was one time in high school that I went to a shooting range with a friend.  I wouldn't mind going again.  But at the same time, it's probably not an activity I would actively seek out.

4. Do you ride roller coasters?

Ah roller coasters.  I have a love/hate relationship with them.  If you see me in line for a roller coaster, you will notice a very nervous looking Tiffany silently praying Hail Mary after Hail Mary.  Once I get on the roller coaster I tend to enjoy it - but I definitely have lots of anxiety...and mental pictures of the coaster flying off it's tracks, (healthy, I know).  I won't ride coasters where I am laying down (Like Superman) and there was one ride in Kings Dominion I refused to ride as well - it literally stopped with you hanging over the precipice before dropping you.  That's a big fat no in my book.

5. What's your favorite flower?

Daffodil!  I love daffodils.  I seriously get giddy driving down highways when I first notice daffodils blooming along the side of the road.

They're so bright, and make me happy

I also greatly enjoy this poem - http://www.poetryfoundation.org/poem/174790

6. Are you allergic to anything?

Yes.  I am allergic to cats.  Not terribly allergic - as long as I don't touch the cats I'm ok.  But my eyes will start getting a little itchy if I'm sitting on a couch or something that cats tend to sit on.  It also amuses me that cats seem to sense I can't pet them because they will come right up to me and try to do that whole rubbing my legs business.  

I also recently found that I may be allergic to broccoli.  Totally random thing to be allergic to.  And I say "may" because in two meals that I ate that made me sick, the common ingredient was broccoli.  And I've been too scared to test the theory out again.  

Hope everyone has a wonderful week!

Where I've been

I don't think I realized just how much has been happening during my semi-blogging hiatus until I sat down to write about it.  And through it all I am always just...impressed, with how I see things come together in a way that I could have never planned.  You know the saying, If you want to make God laugh and all.  I am also just so...grateful.  

A couple months ago my mother was diagnosed with Stage 1 breast cancer.  My mother.  The woman who does not store anything in plastic.  Who eats only organic foods.  Who has been terrified of the "c" word from the time her own father died from lung cancer.  I just thank God that they found it early and it was Stage 1.  She had a lumpectomy done and we just found out last week that my mom does not need to have radiation or chemotherapy, they got it all out, and it hasn't spread (despite being a more aggressive form).  We consider it a miracle and I am SO thankful.  My mother is the person who taught me my faith, she's the one who instilled in me my love for my faith and despite being in an incredibly difficult situation, she never lost hers.  She had complete faith that God would get her through it.  And He did.  

The next big thing going on: In the beginning of May a friend of mine sent me a text telling me that a College Counselor position had opened at the Catholic high school where she works.  If you have ever asked me what my "dream job" is, or where I see myself working - I have always answered that I would love to work in a Catholic high school.  I like the schedule of working in a school, and being able to work in a place that supports my beliefs, and where I could really use my theology background and my Pastoral Counseling degree just sounded like a dream come true.  However, I started my job in March...just 3 months ago (4 now).  I would pretty much be the worst employee ever if I applied, right?  Well, my husband, family, and various other friends, told me that I would be crazy not to apply, especially if it is what I consider to be my "dream" job.  So I thought about it...went back and forth many, many times, and ended up sending in my application the day we left for our trip to FL (we spent a week at the end of May in gorgeous Grayton beach with Chris' mother's side of the family for grandfather's 80th birthday).  It was actually while I was in Fl that the little pieces of this job and what I can only call God's plan for this job started coming together.

To get technical for a moment - I am a LGPC or Licensed Graduate Profession Counselor.  As a counselor, my goal is to become fully licensed, or, an LCPC (Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor).  Having that license means that I can counsel without being supervised and I can open my own practice.  To go from the LG to LC license you need 3,000 supervised counseling hours - 1,500 of those need to be face-to-face hours.  1,000 hours can be accrued in your Master's degree program.  You also need 100 supervision hours.  And to pass the National Counseling Exam (passed while I was getting my degree).  

Ever since leaving my old (terrible, awful) job I have been worried about the number of hours I have.  I had been (not so patiently) waiting for my previous supervisor to get back to me with my # of hours from the old job.  Part of my concern about going to the high school was that I would not get enough hours to get my license.  Well, while in Fl my previous supervisor emailed me my hours - 1,200 face-to-face hours.  AKA I only need 300 more face to face hours (as of now, at my new job, I have over 200).  So basically I don't need to worry about getting hours at the high school.

When we got back from vacation the school called to schedule and interview with me (woo!).  I met with four individuals - the principal, head of guidance, vice principal of academic affairs and vice principal of student affair.  It was a 2 hour interview.  I made Chris laugh though when I told him I dropped the words "encyclical" and "catechism" at the interview.  During the interview, they informed me that there was also  Freshman/Sophomore counseling position open.  As the interview went on, I realized that I definitely was not qualified to be a college counselor, but freshman/sophomore, yes.  A week later they called and offered me...the freshman/sophomore counseling position!  My worry about making a bad decision for our family (I was fairly certain the pay would be considerably less) was put to rest since it is a pay cut, but certainly not a huge amount (plus Chris reminded me money isn't everything, duh).  My worry about having to pay for super expensive CEUs - there's tuition reimbursement for that.  My worry about having to pay for supervision - tuition reimbursement should cover that as well according to the principal.  My friend also told me that she never even knew about the freshman/sophomore position, and they never announced it.  I'm fairly certain if that position hadn't been open, I wouldn't have gotten the job.

I had a really difficult time making the decision.  Deep down I knew that I wanted to take the job...but I have this thing about letting people down, and keeping everyone happy (it's been a difficult lifelong lesson of...I cannot make everyone happy).  I did not want to let my current company down, and I felt like a horrible employee for quitting after only 4 months of employment, especially when this job has been great, it wasn't like I was necessarily unhappy.  But, I put on my big girl britches and told them on Friday.  Super hard and I have a feeling my supervisor is disappointed...even if she said she understood, I'm pretty sure she was upset.

Now that it's done, I'm starting to actually let myself get excited about my new job.  I still can't quite believe that I got the job...that I get to work in an environment that can help me grow not only professionally but also spiritually.  Granted, this month (or however long they keep me) is going to be a bit awkward with my supervisor and coworkers...but what can I do.

Along with these two big things - Chris and I also celebrated our 2 year anniversary.  And we had our goddaughter's baptism.  Friend's bridal and baby showers.  My sister preparing for her second due in Aug.  Doing some projects around the house (we're doing a mini kitchen reno here soon).

So that's where I've been.  Here's hoping these posts get more regular.  And here's hoping everyone had a great weekend.

MIA blogger returns...to Answer Me This!

It's been...a very long while.  I could totally psychoanalyze why I've been absent from blogging despite many blog post ideas running through my head and sitting in my drafts...but I won't for your sake.  Instead, I decided to make my return by linking up with Kendra's Answer Me This.  I've been following along with this link-up and am excited to finally take a stab at it myself.

1. When's the last time you got a new bathing suit?

The last time I bought a bathing suit was in April/May of this year.  I used to be a bikini wearing girl...I won't get into the bikini/one-piece debate, what you wear at the pool/beach is up to you, but I recently decided that wearing bikinis was no longer for me.  Plus, at the end of May we were going to Florida with Chris' family and I didn't need to be worrying about feeling scandalous in front of his grandparents.  And I just wanted to feel more comfortable...so I went on a bit of a (expensive) bathing suit buying spree.

This one I got was my favorite - and I always look just like that at the beach...

Followed closely by this one...I love polka dots

2. Who made the last incoming call on your phone?

 

My last incoming call is from my mom.  Not all that surprising, she's the one who calls me the most.  I tend to be more of an email/text message girl.

3. If you receive communion, do you receive it in the hands or on the tongue?

I receive on the tongue.  When I was preparing  for my First Communion my mother more or less put the fear of God into me about receiving on the tongue ONLY.  I remember once, I had a similar experience to Kendra's son, and an overly zealous/pushy Eucharistic minister sort of ignore my tongue and placed the host right into my hands.  I felt awful.  I am not sure if there are church documents about the best way to receive the Eucharist (if you have some to share, I'd love to look at them) but I just know that for me personally I feel like receiving on the tongue, and bowing before, are just a couple acts of reverence I can show Our Lord.

If it's good enough for Bl. Mother Teresa, it's good enough for me!

4. Do you have a tattoo?

No, but to be honest, I have kind of always wanted one.  One that incorporates my faith in some way since thats the only thing I would want permanently on my body.  (I LOVE Haley's tattoo art) I, however, am a scaredy cat and will more than likely never get a tattoo...plus I think my mother would murder me and that would just be sad.

5. How many dinner plates are in your house?

In our cabinets we have 8 sets of these dishes:

  

Aren't they awesomely funky?  I love them

And then in storage we have 8 (or is it 12?) sets of this fine china...that we have yet to use and don't even have space for in our townhouse.

So I guess that makes either 16 or 20 dinner plates in our house...but only 8 that we actually use.

6. Do you have an accent?

Not that I am aware of.  Although there have been a few times where people said they could tell I'm from right outside Baltimore.  Something about not pronouncing the "T" in Baltimore?  But in my opinion, no, I do not have an accent.

Now, go check out other's "Answer Me This" at Kendra's and have a happy Sunday everyone.  Here's to hoping this return to blogging will stick, I kind of missed it.