Answer Me This #2

Returning for some more "Answer Me This" hosted by Kendra at Catholic All Year.  Head on over and learn a little more about different bloggers

1. How often do you take public transportation?

Just about never.  We live in the suburbs right smack between DC and Baltimore which means we need cars to get most any where.  When Chris was still living in the "city" aka Baltimore we would take the bus anywhere we wanted to go for our date nights and what not.  Or if we want to go into DC we will most likely take the metro.  Which I hate.  I don't know why, but it freaks me out.

2. How many cousins do you have?

11 - 2 on my dads side and 9 on my mom's side.  Although, marrying into Chris' family means that I have waay more cousins now.  He has like 20 cousins.  It's pretty great.  Especially since the majority of my cousins are in Colombia.  The rest are spread all over the U.S. so I don't really get to see them all that often.

Here are some of Chris' cousins - minus a few

Mom's side of the fam - some cousins, most of them missing though

3. Have you ever fired a gun?

I have actually.  There was one time in high school that I went to a shooting range with a friend.  I wouldn't mind going again.  But at the same time, it's probably not an activity I would actively seek out.

4. Do you ride roller coasters?

Ah roller coasters.  I have a love/hate relationship with them.  If you see me in line for a roller coaster, you will notice a very nervous looking Tiffany silently praying Hail Mary after Hail Mary.  Once I get on the roller coaster I tend to enjoy it - but I definitely have lots of anxiety...and mental pictures of the coaster flying off it's tracks, (healthy, I know).  I won't ride coasters where I am laying down (Like Superman) and there was one ride in Kings Dominion I refused to ride as well - it literally stopped with you hanging over the precipice before dropping you.  That's a big fat no in my book.

5. What's your favorite flower?

Daffodil!  I love daffodils.  I seriously get giddy driving down highways when I first notice daffodils blooming along the side of the road.

They're so bright, and make me happy

I also greatly enjoy this poem - http://www.poetryfoundation.org/poem/174790

6. Are you allergic to anything?

Yes.  I am allergic to cats.  Not terribly allergic - as long as I don't touch the cats I'm ok.  But my eyes will start getting a little itchy if I'm sitting on a couch or something that cats tend to sit on.  It also amuses me that cats seem to sense I can't pet them because they will come right up to me and try to do that whole rubbing my legs business.  

I also recently found that I may be allergic to broccoli.  Totally random thing to be allergic to.  And I say "may" because in two meals that I ate that made me sick, the common ingredient was broccoli.  And I've been too scared to test the theory out again.  

Hope everyone has a wonderful week!

Where I've been

I don't think I realized just how much has been happening during my semi-blogging hiatus until I sat down to write about it.  And through it all I am always just...impressed, with how I see things come together in a way that I could have never planned.  You know the saying, If you want to make God laugh and all.  I am also just so...grateful.  

A couple months ago my mother was diagnosed with Stage 1 breast cancer.  My mother.  The woman who does not store anything in plastic.  Who eats only organic foods.  Who has been terrified of the "c" word from the time her own father died from lung cancer.  I just thank God that they found it early and it was Stage 1.  She had a lumpectomy done and we just found out last week that my mom does not need to have radiation or chemotherapy, they got it all out, and it hasn't spread (despite being a more aggressive form).  We consider it a miracle and I am SO thankful.  My mother is the person who taught me my faith, she's the one who instilled in me my love for my faith and despite being in an incredibly difficult situation, she never lost hers.  She had complete faith that God would get her through it.  And He did.  

The next big thing going on: In the beginning of May a friend of mine sent me a text telling me that a College Counselor position had opened at the Catholic high school where she works.  If you have ever asked me what my "dream job" is, or where I see myself working - I have always answered that I would love to work in a Catholic high school.  I like the schedule of working in a school, and being able to work in a place that supports my beliefs, and where I could really use my theology background and my Pastoral Counseling degree just sounded like a dream come true.  However, I started my job in March...just 3 months ago (4 now).  I would pretty much be the worst employee ever if I applied, right?  Well, my husband, family, and various other friends, told me that I would be crazy not to apply, especially if it is what I consider to be my "dream" job.  So I thought about it...went back and forth many, many times, and ended up sending in my application the day we left for our trip to FL (we spent a week at the end of May in gorgeous Grayton beach with Chris' mother's side of the family for grandfather's 80th birthday).  It was actually while I was in Fl that the little pieces of this job and what I can only call God's plan for this job started coming together.

To get technical for a moment - I am a LGPC or Licensed Graduate Profession Counselor.  As a counselor, my goal is to become fully licensed, or, an LCPC (Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor).  Having that license means that I can counsel without being supervised and I can open my own practice.  To go from the LG to LC license you need 3,000 supervised counseling hours - 1,500 of those need to be face-to-face hours.  1,000 hours can be accrued in your Master's degree program.  You also need 100 supervision hours.  And to pass the National Counseling Exam (passed while I was getting my degree).  

Ever since leaving my old (terrible, awful) job I have been worried about the number of hours I have.  I had been (not so patiently) waiting for my previous supervisor to get back to me with my # of hours from the old job.  Part of my concern about going to the high school was that I would not get enough hours to get my license.  Well, while in Fl my previous supervisor emailed me my hours - 1,200 face-to-face hours.  AKA I only need 300 more face to face hours (as of now, at my new job, I have over 200).  So basically I don't need to worry about getting hours at the high school.

When we got back from vacation the school called to schedule and interview with me (woo!).  I met with four individuals - the principal, head of guidance, vice principal of academic affairs and vice principal of student affair.  It was a 2 hour interview.  I made Chris laugh though when I told him I dropped the words "encyclical" and "catechism" at the interview.  During the interview, they informed me that there was also  Freshman/Sophomore counseling position open.  As the interview went on, I realized that I definitely was not qualified to be a college counselor, but freshman/sophomore, yes.  A week later they called and offered me...the freshman/sophomore counseling position!  My worry about making a bad decision for our family (I was fairly certain the pay would be considerably less) was put to rest since it is a pay cut, but certainly not a huge amount (plus Chris reminded me money isn't everything, duh).  My worry about having to pay for super expensive CEUs - there's tuition reimbursement for that.  My worry about having to pay for supervision - tuition reimbursement should cover that as well according to the principal.  My friend also told me that she never even knew about the freshman/sophomore position, and they never announced it.  I'm fairly certain if that position hadn't been open, I wouldn't have gotten the job.

I had a really difficult time making the decision.  Deep down I knew that I wanted to take the job...but I have this thing about letting people down, and keeping everyone happy (it's been a difficult lifelong lesson of...I cannot make everyone happy).  I did not want to let my current company down, and I felt like a horrible employee for quitting after only 4 months of employment, especially when this job has been great, it wasn't like I was necessarily unhappy.  But, I put on my big girl britches and told them on Friday.  Super hard and I have a feeling my supervisor is disappointed...even if she said she understood, I'm pretty sure she was upset.

Now that it's done, I'm starting to actually let myself get excited about my new job.  I still can't quite believe that I got the job...that I get to work in an environment that can help me grow not only professionally but also spiritually.  Granted, this month (or however long they keep me) is going to be a bit awkward with my supervisor and coworkers...but what can I do.

Along with these two big things - Chris and I also celebrated our 2 year anniversary.  And we had our goddaughter's baptism.  Friend's bridal and baby showers.  My sister preparing for her second due in Aug.  Doing some projects around the house (we're doing a mini kitchen reno here soon).

So that's where I've been.  Here's hoping these posts get more regular.  And here's hoping everyone had a great weekend.

MIA blogger returns...to Answer Me This!

It's been...a very long while.  I could totally psychoanalyze why I've been absent from blogging despite many blog post ideas running through my head and sitting in my drafts...but I won't for your sake.  Instead, I decided to make my return by linking up with Kendra's Answer Me This.  I've been following along with this link-up and am excited to finally take a stab at it myself.

1. When's the last time you got a new bathing suit?

The last time I bought a bathing suit was in April/May of this year.  I used to be a bikini wearing girl...I won't get into the bikini/one-piece debate, what you wear at the pool/beach is up to you, but I recently decided that wearing bikinis was no longer for me.  Plus, at the end of May we were going to Florida with Chris' family and I didn't need to be worrying about feeling scandalous in front of his grandparents.  And I just wanted to feel more comfortable...so I went on a bit of a (expensive) bathing suit buying spree.

This one I got was my favorite - and I always look just like that at the beach...

Followed closely by this one...I love polka dots

2. Who made the last incoming call on your phone?

 

My last incoming call is from my mom.  Not all that surprising, she's the one who calls me the most.  I tend to be more of an email/text message girl.

3. If you receive communion, do you receive it in the hands or on the tongue?

I receive on the tongue.  When I was preparing  for my First Communion my mother more or less put the fear of God into me about receiving on the tongue ONLY.  I remember once, I had a similar experience to Kendra's son, and an overly zealous/pushy Eucharistic minister sort of ignore my tongue and placed the host right into my hands.  I felt awful.  I am not sure if there are church documents about the best way to receive the Eucharist (if you have some to share, I'd love to look at them) but I just know that for me personally I feel like receiving on the tongue, and bowing before, are just a couple acts of reverence I can show Our Lord.

If it's good enough for Bl. Mother Teresa, it's good enough for me!

4. Do you have a tattoo?

No, but to be honest, I have kind of always wanted one.  One that incorporates my faith in some way since thats the only thing I would want permanently on my body.  (I LOVE Haley's tattoo art) I, however, am a scaredy cat and will more than likely never get a tattoo...plus I think my mother would murder me and that would just be sad.

5. How many dinner plates are in your house?

In our cabinets we have 8 sets of these dishes:

  

Aren't they awesomely funky?  I love them

And then in storage we have 8 (or is it 12?) sets of this fine china...that we have yet to use and don't even have space for in our townhouse.

So I guess that makes either 16 or 20 dinner plates in our house...but only 8 that we actually use.

6. Do you have an accent?

Not that I am aware of.  Although there have been a few times where people said they could tell I'm from right outside Baltimore.  Something about not pronouncing the "T" in Baltimore?  But in my opinion, no, I do not have an accent.

Now, go check out other's "Answer Me This" at Kendra's and have a happy Sunday everyone.  Here's to hoping this return to blogging will stick, I kind of missed it.

Old, New, Borrowed, Blue

When I saw that Stephanie at Captive the Heart was hosting a wedding link-up...well, let's just say I'm glad no one saw my reaction.  I love weddings.  And I love reminiscing (is it actually reminiscing if it was only 2 years ago?) about our wedding day.

So, without further ado, I give you my something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue.

My something old is probably my favorite out of the four.  When Chris and I got engaged, his mother very generously gave us a couple engagement gifts.  One was an ornament with the date of our engagement.  The old box I opened held what looked like a baby bonnet.  To say I was confused would be putting it mildly.  Chris' mom saw my confusion and explained that the bonnet was given to Chris for his baptism.  Inside the bonnet was a poem that stated the bonnet was to be used for the son (or daughters) baptism, and then with a little snip it becomes a handkerchief to be given to the son's fiancé or for the daughter's "something old."  Pretty sure I teared up right there.  I decided the handkerchief would be wrapped around my bouquet.  Knowing that it was Chris' when he was a baby just made it that extra special

It fit well with my "lace" theme

This picture also shows my "something borrowed."  I knew I wanted a rosary to be wrapped around my bouquet as well.  It would make me feel like the Blessed Mother was helping to walk me down the isle along with my dad.  So I decided to ask my mom if I could borrow one of her rosaries.  This particular one I'd always loved, it's from the Vatican and whenever I'd pray with my mom, this was always the rosary I wanted to pray with.

My something new was, of course, my dress.  I love, love, LOVED my dress.  I still remember being obsessed with watching "Say Yes to the Dress" and kind of laughing when girls would start crying when they found "the" dress.  I never thought that would be me.  I went dress shopping with my mom and I knew that I wanted a lace dress.  Something timeless, and classic.  And preferably with a little sleeve - I've never been comfortable without wearing at least a thick tank in church.  But at the same time I didn't want to look like a little old lady or anything, I still wanted to look youthful and pretty.  When I found "the" dress...I teared up.  Not full on crying, but I definitely had tears in my eyes.  My mom did too.  It was just exactly what I had pictured wearing as I walked down the aisle toward Chris.

My something blue was an idea I had seen on Pinterest (shocking, I know).  I had each of my bridesmaids sign my shoe in blue ink.  Again, it was supposed to symbolize my girls helping me walk down the aisle.  There is also some myth that the person whose name wears off the most is the next to get married.  But to be honest, I forgot to look at the end of the night...so I don't know whose name it was!

Now, go check out Captive the Heart for more wonderful wedding traditions :-)

Warm weather Quick Takes

Joining Jen for another 7 Quick Takes

1.  You may (or may not) have noticed some changes 'round these here parts...I switched up the template for my blog....It's a "free" template...and I'm still trying to work things out with the code and what not.  But I certainly don't know all that I could about code so we'll see how that goes. Thoughts?  Like this better or worse than my other template?

2. I don't know where most of you live, but here in Maryland we've enjoyed quite a gorgeous weekend.  Chris and I spent some time in Lowe's and Home Depot getting a few herbs to start our (very small) herb box.  Mint, basil, and cilantro.  I'm hoping we can get a few more/maybe some veggies but we'll see how well we can keep these babies alive.

Day spent plantin' some herbs and sippin' some pomegranate martini

3. So I'm really hoping spring has officially sprung.  And am therefore beginning my spring cleaning.  I started today by cleaning out my closet.  Those skinny jeans (might as well be called sausage stuffers) that I've been holding on to, just assuring myself I'll fit into one day?  Yea, they're being donated so someone 1/2 my size can enjoy them.  That slim fit shirt that's become just a little too slim fitting?  Also getting donated.  Good Will is gonna love me.

4. Which leads me to my new found commitment to working out/eating healthier.  I'm using the My Fitnesss Pal app and have a gym membership @ Planet Fitness.  I am determined to lost that "newlywed 15"...2 years later.  The fact that we're going to Fl with Chris' family in a month is also a motivating factor.

5.  I'm working really hard at ignoring the fact that this month is yet again a month without a positive pregnancy test.  Trying reeeeally hard you guys.  And I hate complaining, because I know there are people who are suffering through so much worse, I know.  So I cover it all up, and pretend I'm totally ok with it.  I drink my pomegranate martinis and act like this is what I want.  Because I need to do that or I'll end a blubbering mess every month.  Especially when very well meaning old ladies remind you "not to wait too long" Uh, thanks.  We're not exactly in control over here, but thanks for that mini punch in the gut (well meaning, I know she meant well!)  Ugh, and just typing these words makes me feel like a terrible person because I feel like I don't have the right to be so upset by this.  I keep telling myself, and Chris does an amazing job of reminding me, that God  is in control and His timing is where we need to place our trust.  Your Will be done, not mine. (my latest mantra...seems appropriate for Holy Week)

6. Speaking of Holy Week, have you seen Kendra's post about how she does Holy Week?  I loved it, and think I'd like to incorporate some of what she does into our week this year.  My new company gives us a day off on Good Friday, and Chris has fought for his Good Friday off as well, so I'm still searching for ways to create new Holy Week traditions for our family.  Last year we attending the Holy Thursday mass, I went to the Good Friday service on my own (Chris' company wasn't so generous last year), and then we just did Easter Sunday with the family.  This year will probably be very similar, expect I'll have my husband by my side for Good Friday, which is so nice.  We usually also watch either The Passion of the Christ, of Jesus of Nazareth.  How do you keep the "holy" in Holy Week?

7. This article was trending on my Facebook news feed this week.  I'm so glad I decided to click the link and read it.  He makes so many fantastic points about modesty....like this:

                "Modest is hottest might work as a bumper sticker, because it rhymes and it’s three words long, but it makes for a woefully abysmal defense of modesty. The point of modesty isn’t to better achieve the intended results of immodesty. Modesty isn’t  virtuous because it’s ‘hot,’ it’s virtuous because it’s concerned with something far greater than being hot."

 I feel like with the warmer months coming up, and the great "bikini debate" that is sure to arise, this article is just another great way to look at modesty.  Hope you enjoy it as much as I did.

And with that, I bid you a Happy Weekend :-)  I hope you're enjoying the nice weather as much as Chris and I are!

Dealing with "Secondary Stress" in the helping profession

So, as you, the reader, may or may not have gathered, I am a Pastoral Counselor.  I did a brief overview of what that is in one of my first posts here.

I recently started a new job working with children ages 3-18 at an Outpatient Mental Health Clinic.  And it's been an intense first month.  I have already had so many different counseling experiences versus when I was at my old job.  I'm thankful for these experiences and I am hoping they will help me grow as a counselor.

At the same time, though, I have given in to a sort of fear about my profession.  I became a counselor so that I can help people.  As I wrote in my "thesis" paper for my Masters degree, I hope that my work as a counselor will help lead my clients along restful waters.  A place where the weary and burdened come to lay their sorrows, fears, etc. at my feet.  But sometimes those burdens come with CPS reports or safety contracts.  And those are difficult.  From the standpoint of it being sad to see your clients go through something so hard, as well as the more practical liability standpoint.  And I hate to think of that, because it makes me feel like I'm narrowing the work that we as counselors do to something that avoids liability.  Or something that will pass an audit from the state or insurance company.

I don't want the work I do with my clients to suddenly become a burden, or a space for fear.  Yes, clients will come to me with a painful past or present.  I need to hold that for them without fear.  Yes, there may come times when reports need to be made, and yes, it will be hard to do, but I know I have support where I am and the report is ultimately to ensure the safety of my clients.

I've been having a lot of fear and doubt about my chosen profession...pretty much since I started my first "big girl" job.  Which is in stark contrast to the joy I felt in my Masters program and clinical internships.  This work has never been "easy" but I certainly never worried about liability like I have been recently.  So where is this all coming from?!

I was browsing my book shelf the other day and came upon a book written by one of Loyola's Pastoral Counseling professors, Dr. Robert J. Wicks.  The book is entitled The Resilient Clinician.  I picked it up and just started reading the introduction to see if it was something I felt like delving into further.  And boy am I glad I did.  Seriously, the book opens with the quote, "They may forget what you said, but they will never forget how you made them feel" Carl W. Buechner.  Pretty sure I internally yelled, YES!  Dr. Wicks speaks about something called "secondary stress" often felt by those in the helping profession.  Secondary stress occurs when we in the helping profession give, and give to our clients, patients etc. to the point that we have nothing left for ourselves.  Our practice fails, we start to make more mistakes, and even our health can start deteriorating.

I'm really looking forward to continue reading the book.  In fact, I think I desperately need to read this book.  The word that comes to mind when I think about how I'm feeling a month into my new job?  Oh. ver. whelmed.  Intakes to type, and Treatment Plans to do for just about all of my new clients (the number is quickly growing).  On top of keeping up with my daily contact notes.  And other administrative things as needed.  And all of that after leaving a super stressful job (for different reasons).  I probably should have taken more time off than a few days between jobs, just so I could de-stress from one job before beginning another.  I am so incredibly grateful for this new job, and all that I have been learning, don't get me wrong.  But the nature of this job is more difficult than some.  And I think this book is a great reminder that I need to make sure I take care of myself too.  I can't do my job well, and help others if I can't even take care of myself.

If you're in the helping profession, doctors, nurses, social workers, counselors etc. I highly recommend this book.  I'm hoping to write a little more about it once I've finished it.

My super late link up

I missed linking up with Jen (two weeks in a row) but I can still make it for WIWS!

This is still in 7 Quick takes format though...I started it last week, and just finished, hence the "updates"

1. I'm super excited about my newest crochet project.  This year seems to be the year of twin pregnancies, including Chris' cousin.  We're all super excited.  These babies are the first of the new generation on Chris' side and they're starting out with a bang!  Identical twin girls!  Her shower is at the end of April, and instead of cards, she wants books.  Which led to the inspiration for this project...here is a sneak peek of what I'm working on for her shower

Thing 1 and Thing 2 from the cat in the hat!  I love it, and while my slight OCD tendencies are rebelling against the less that neat "writing" I'm still pretty happy with how it turned out.  Thoughts?  Any ways I could make it better?  I modified a pattern from RepeatCrafterMe

UPDATE: 

2. Since this is also my What I Wore Sunday post, here's my Sunday outfit

From last weekend...

Sorry for the poor phone quality photos...I was in a rush and didn't have a chance to get my legit camera

The Deets: Shirt - Gap Outlet Skirt - Ol' faithful from Target Scarf - don't remember, but it's braided, a new way I learned to wear it Belt - stole from another outfit

I finally have a chambray shirt and I kind of love it :-)

UPDATE from this weekend:

Feel like this makes me look larger than reality...hmm

Dress: Anne Taylor outlet Shrug: WHBM 

3. Yesterday (last weekend) Chris and I went up to see my sister and brother-in-law to celebrate my niece's 2nd birthday.  I cannot believe she is two already!  Our family's little miracle baby, prayed for, for 11 years.  She's grown into such a smart, beautiful, funny, sweet little girl and I am so proud to be her aunt and god-mother.

4. Chris and I are watching (were watching) The Walking Dead finale...as we speak (type?)...wow.  Just...wow.  I still can't believe Chris got me into this show (I'm not one for a lot of blood and gore) but I'm quite glad he did.  I'm hooked now.  Check it out if you dare...and if you'd like a Catholic spin on the show, read Cari's recaps of the show...I look forward to reading them just as much as I do watching the show

5. Any Game of Thrones fans out there?  How bout that season premiere?!  I am love Arya more and more for a future baby girls name...although spelled Aria since there is actually a St. Aria.

6. I'm writing a post about secondary stress in helping professions.  I think I've been feeling this a little more than I would like to admit, and after beginning to read The Resilient Clinician I'm realizing how detrimental it can be both to my work as a counselor as well as to my personal life.

7. Grab your tissues for this one.  I may or may not have lost it a lil bit watching it.  Even Chris had a hard time watching it.  But I promise it has a happy ending.  My friend who posted this video on Facebook made note that during the first 4 min of the movie the baby would have been legally abortable (word?)